Back in 2021, The Church of the Palms became a W.I.S.E. congregation for mental health. W = Welcoming; I = Inclusive; S = Supportive; E = Engaging.
Have you noticed that folks in this neck of the woods seem especially stressed lately? Uber-cranky, hyper-sensitive due to the heat, or maybe it’s the exhausting election cycle, or possibly it’s personal grief, or maybe it’s just life in general. People are stressed!
To help us on our journey, let’s remember these simple guidelines for mental wellness on what to say and what not to say.
- Don’t say: “Everything happens for a reason.” Rather, say, “Everything happens, and some things are random and devastating.” Be W.I.S.E. – provide support not judgment.
- Don’t say: “Everyone wouldn’t want you to be sad.” Rather, say, “People will completely understand why you are heart broken and would feel the exact same way if roles were reserved.” Be W.I.S.E. – provide support not judgment.
- Don’t say: “You just need to focus on being positive.” Rather, say, “Find people and places that don’t make you feel like you have to hide your pain and remind you that it’s okay to feel at all.” Be W.I.S.E. – provide support not judgment.
- Don’t say: “They’re in a better place.” Rather, say, “They’re gone and it’s unfair.” Be W.I.S.E. – provide support not judgment.
- Or, don’t say anything at all. Just listen to learn. Be W.I.S.E. – provide support not judgment.
Shalom, Paul